Remember the movie "What Women Want" with Mel Gibson a few years back. It was all about the ins and outs of relationships and a true "Chick Flick". In the movie Mel gained insight into the woman's mind and was able to read it verbatim and was BAFFLED and overwhelmed with what they REALLY wanted. He had it all wrong!
What about children, yes, in the time of the giving season we are all talking about what our children "want" this year. They want, let me guess, a new IPhone, or a new tech device. They want new new new, something. They wait for Christmas morning, tear through the presents, one after another, like a hungry bear in a campsite left attended. GRRRR...where is my....
You know what I mean if you have ever seen children on Christmas morning!
After the presents are open, the food has been eaten, the company has gone home, do you ever feel a sense of sadness? Do your children? Yes, they are off playing with the things we thoughtfully got them. Although, there is a feeling of emptiness, or loss that sometimes creeps up. We all have good intentions, and really try to show our children we love them everyday.
It just seems that maybe, just maybe, even they don't know what they really want.
They want what we want. It is my genuine hunch that they want to belong, a place to fit, a purpose in this life. Isn't that the true core of our essence and wanting? The opposite of depression is purpose. The opposite of sadness is belonging.
Joy is in acceptance
Belong | Purpose | Acceptance
We can gently practice this each day this month by showing our children that they belong. Just as they are, accepting them and finding the little ways we show them their purpose. Allow them to help, praise them in the little ways. Sit with them, play, read, snuggle, watch the birds out the window, just be together, belong together! Tell them they don't have to be perfect. Tell them all the things that you needed to hear when you were young.
Don't assume teenagers don't apply. They do! Even more so, and if you can endure the eye rolling, you get extra credit! I am in no way saying skip the presents. Just don't forget the good stuff!
They truly don't know yet just how important they are in this world and it is our job to show them.