We all come in to this world, magically, some would say, with EXPECTATIONS! Where did they come from anyways. I have taken some time this summer to observe the world from an outsiders perspective and noticed a common theme. Everyone has expectations, and many people have disappointment over these expectations not being met.
Disappointment, anger, depression, stress, anxiety, all stem from somewhere right??? Yes, brain chemistry has something to do with it. Of course, there is the theory we learn maladaptive thinking patterns from our family as well. Although, it seems all of this is exacerbated by EXPECTATIONS!
I often hear from my beloved clients these words "I didn't think it was going to be like this", " I thought it was going to be easier", "It shouldn't have turned out this way". Followed by depression, anxiety, and of course STRESS...with more expectations after all of that, and you have a vicious cycle my dear friend.
Why do we believe it was supposed to be more than it is. Why do we make these assumptions? It can sometimes be a set up for disappointment. Or maybe a driving force for improvement? Let's think it over and find ways to balance this concept out.
Cognitive Behavioral Re-frame Tip.
Expectation- I thought once I moved to a new school, town, or next step in my life, had a baby, got married,
life would get easier.
CBT Re-frame- I have new problems now, although I am more in control this time and have more life experience to get through them easier that I did before.
I LOVE Cognitive behavioral techniques and working with expectations, acceptance, personal growth, among other personal mental health issues...